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Sometimes, I feel really proud of my genderfluid identity.
Sometimes I hate it and wish that I had a different gender.
Sometimes I love the way I look dressed as a girl. I decide I like my chest.
Other times I think I make a terrible girl.
Then I think I make a handsome guy. Sometimes I wish I had just been born a boy.
Then I think I look too girly.
Sometimes I give up entirely on both genders and try being androgynous.
Sometimes I like this, but then I feel myself leaning more towards a certain gender.
Then I try to be that gender, but things change, again.
Sometimes, I wish I could decide.
Sometimes I think I might just be trans and confused about it.
Sometimes I think I’m cis and I’m just going through a phase.
Sometimes I think I might just be looking for attention without knowing.
Sometimes, I hate people not seeing me exactly how I am in my head.
Sometimes, I’m happy I can hide.
Every now and then, I just get fed up with myself and try to give up…. even though I fully realise that the foul opinions of others are nothing to pay mind to.
It’s taken me a long time to realise that there are ups and downs to everything. Not just being genderfluid, but in absolutely everything. It’s taken me even longer to realise that, no matter what I’m going through, someone else feels similiar and that there are plenty of wonderful people willing to help. The gender I identify doesn’t matter, as long as I’m still true to me, and I surround myself with good people. It shouldn’t have to matter, because it’s a personal thing there to make me comfortable and happy that everyone should respect, regardless. People who think less of me because of it aren’t worth my time, because they are unintelligent and foolish. I can identify as male, female, neither, or both. It doesn’t matter. I can dress like one gender and be another. I realise now that it’s possible, and it’s fine. I thank everyone to my fullest for helping me through the bumpy roads of being a young adult. I’m whoever I want to be, and that’s just how a person should be. I’m not perfect, and never will be, and that’s great. <3
Those mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.
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mortimervanwyke posted this
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Privet! My name is Morty. I am a young and eccentric steampunking genderfluid, mortuary enthousiest and artist. I am a Canadian citizen with a Russian/Doukhobor background, and I hail from beautiful British Columbia.
I am going to be going to school for funeral directing and embalming, and have a thing for autopsy and post-mortem photography, I fore-warn you. Dead stuff is great.
I also love art and music, victoriana, the macabre,1920's and 30's fashion, good comedy, collar bones, teeth, owls, classy clothing, tea, sepia photos, art, sci-fi, bodies in general, piercings/tattoos and theatre.
I love a lot of things. I watch too much Doctor who and Murdoch Mysteries. Hannibal is my love. I adore A Monster in Paris.Tokyo Mew Mew is my guilty pleasure.
I am demi-sexual/gray-a. Probably. I don't know. That's probably unimportant.
Religiously, I am Pagan. I tend to blog about such from time to time.
I am currently on the road to recovery from anorexia and bulimia, and I am also diagnosed with OCD, severe dyscalculia, ADHD and Anxiety disorder, and suffer from frequent panic attacks. This isn't usually relevant, but tend to be a little difficult to deal with from time to time. I occasionally blog about said things. I often have to take long abrupt breaks from the internet because of my ED and panic attacks, which put me in and out of the hospital / ED clinics, so forgive me if I not around for a while without reason. Our hospital just doesn't seem to have wifi.
I tag posts about such things with TW: eating disorder.
I think pro-ana is disgusting and I am highly against it. If you need to talk about these things, I am always here.
The content of my blog changes regularly. I also change regularly. This is a personal tumblr, so really, I just blog about whatever I feel like blogging about. I'm pretty friendly, so if you want to chat, even about nothing, don't be shy. I'll always try my hardest to reply as soon as possible. Occasionally NSFW. Usually nudity and some somewhat graphic surgery/autopsy photos, from time to time.
Much love for you all. Thank you for visiting my tumblr. Everyone of you makes me a happier person <3
